What were the reasons why my client [name withheld] yet again was taken advantage of by strangers she talked to in a line to buy cinema tickets, and ended up watching someone’s elderly mother not only during the movie, but was stuck waiting an hour and a half for them to return for her?

This is yet another episode illustrating her good nature, her generosity, and her big heart that is always willing to extend herself in help or service to another. It is simply who she is—a very loving, thoughtful person. This makes her vulnerable and her low self-esteem makes her vulnerable to a fault, because she is totally boxed in. Not only does she naturally wish to help others, she will not go against this inner divine impulse to do something even as selfish as saying no to strangers asking something inappropriate of her that would be an inconvenience at a minimum and a potential serious liability at worst. That was the case here. While she could have helped out by watching the mother who wanted to see the same movie as she did and not the choice of her family members, to take responsibility for supervising such a person with no history or understanding of their frailty and their needs is an inappropriate risk to the self, yet she took this on willingly by subordinating entirely her own desires. So although the impulse was a lofty one, it denied service to the self, which is indeed a sacred obligation to protect one’s own being and soul from harm, and that could have been decided differently. As it turns out, that would have definitely been the case because she was being exploited and the conduct of those family members in going out to dinner leaving her stranded in charge of this elderly woman who had no one else to look out for her, so she remained for an hour and a half hoping they would show up, and worrying the whole time, shows the folly in simply doing what anyone might ask of you without understanding more of the particulars about who you are dealing with and the nature of the involvement and the expectations. This was clearly a case where on its face, the family members were cavalier at a minimum and in actuality, rather reckless in trusting this woman to a stranger, even a female, not knowing how reliable or helpful they might be in an emergency. And to then leave the premises entirely for an extended period of time, leaving the mother stranded, shows a blatant disregard for her well-being and is quite revealing of the character of these people. This reinforces the perspective that if you consider that no reasonable person would trust a loved one to a stranger sight unseen, even though they might make friendly‑seeming small talk for a few minutes, is not a sign of judgment or character and might represent a slippery slope of involvement in something that goes badly. That is what took place here unfortunately, although not a serious end result, but a good illustration of the weakness of this client in being unable to say no and the consequences to her when this might happen. The answer, as always, is further healing work to help her to reclaim the lost power taken away by the many abusers in her life who belittled and demeaned her and left her with so low a view of herself and few expectations of decent treatment by others.